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September 26th, 2010
October 2nd, 2009
September 25th, 2009
August 30th, 2009
 | 11:45 pm - church of Jared-butt
never mind the damned music, it's Jared Pada's ASS SITE (spoilers for gag reel S4)
These are the things I think of as I sit on my own ass while doing REAL LIVE MOM THINGS like driving my soccer-mom van and hitting Girl Scout meetings. I dream of a well-built ass while I stand hamster guard at 12:30 am - as if it were my own life, as if I loved it more than fan fiction porn.
In reality, the hamster IS cute. He's a black bear hamster.
Cats think he's real cute as well. He's up on the dresser in the girls' room surrounded with cat obstacle-like things that keep crashing to the ground. The cage is good and he'll be safe unless they manage to knock it off. I'll try and secure it in the morning. In the meantime, I'm thinking ass. It gets me through.
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August 16th, 2009
 | 06:49 pm - Paula Wilshe Award
You crazy S&H fandom, you put me in the finals of the Paula Wilshe Award:) I am so so surprised. I had no idea I'd ever be in that final list, so it's a huge surprise and a really nice one. I'm touched and really glad. Still hard to believe. (Keri, did you make a typo;)
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July 26th, 2009
| 10:50 pm - drinking games and stuff
So, Cass and Cheryl and I played a drinking game last night. We picked Supernatural's "Mystery Spot" and chose 4 different drinking prompts: Dean dies, somebody says "pig in a poke," Asia, and Sam's forehead speaks Arabic (meaning when he wrinkles his forehead just so, it has some curves and shapes that remind us of written Arabic). Whoever spots the prompt calls it out and we suck it down.
There is a section of this episode where you cannot take the bottle from your lips between drinks. I actually fell behind. Whew.
On a related note, I should honestly stop reading SPN interviews. Feels like more of the same and quite honestly puts me off. That's probably more than enough said - I don't really engage anymore in online fandom debate (exhausting and mostly like talking religion - I'd rather write or maybe stick chewed gum in my hair or drown in toilet water). But still, frustrating enough to me with my leanings and personal viewpoint of the characters that I sort of wish I didn't like the show anymore.
Also, zombie info most wonderful, referred to me by Cass: Five Scientific Reasons a Zombie Apocalypse Could Actually Happen
Also, went to see X-Men Origins: Wolverine today. In typical fashion for me, I now want to read some hopefully good Wolverine/Gambit fiction. I know NOTHING about the X-Men, comics or movies. Just this one movie.
Annnd have a picture from the lake where I picked my 8 year old up from this morning (she went camping with the Brownies):
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July 21st, 2009
| 12:30 am - I know it's not nice
But. Psycho Charlotte across the street is once AGAIN sobbing her heart out over her slight little foreign boyfriend. It's 12:30 at night, I have to go to work in the morning, and I just have to wonder why one can't weep and gnash INFUCKINGSIDE? This isn't the first time. I can't decide whether to run over across the street and hand her Valium (if I had one) or maybe slap her silly.
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July 18th, 2009
| 01:41 am - fan mail: I feel the love
This is from a fan who really appreciated my S&H story, IN THE DYING LIGHT (from silverc, whoever that might be):
Sadistic trash! Didn't read all of this. What kind of a person[?] would want to write or read this !! Why don't you go live by your self on a deserted barren island somewhere far, far away?
now really, is that called for? A deserted barren island sounds good right now. Even the type is shrill!
*edited for you sadists who wanted a story link: In the Dying Light
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/bitospud/courier/white/accomplished.gif) accomplished
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July 13th, 2009
July 12th, 2009
June 30th, 2009
 | 10:40 pm - Harper's Island, Friday the 13th and how I love villians
I've barely been keeping up with it and found quite a lot of it boring. But I tell you something - these last two episodes have nearly maybe probably convinced me to buy the dvds when they come out.
And bonus! Badass Callum Keith Rennie, no less. Bless him.
Why do I always like the villain? Shouldn't this disturb me?
I liked Jason in the new F13 because of his poses, the way he moved, the way he broke through the floor, the way he slung lovely Clay around in the barn, the perspective the camera gave us when he was standing on the roof. For God's sake.
Edit: one of the reasons I like the last two episodes of HI (besides the fact that it's really moving along now) is that I finally care a little about what happens to some of characters, which is always key. I was actually impressed by one in particular and all because of one brief moment:
( spoilery - don't read if you haven't watched the latest episode... )
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/bitospud/courier/white/thoughtful.gif) contemplative
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June 21st, 2009
 | 12:29 pm - Holy Hannah
So. My laptop died last week, right. At first the computer guys said they should be able to get the old info for me, but no dice - it seems something physical was wrong with the hard drive and it frozenated two of their computers when they tried to get the info off. So, total loss. I'd backed up almost everything I wanted to save (somehow I forgot my wallpapers and backgrounds, sob) two months ago, and luckily was able to save the stuff I'd been writing on because I email it to myself all the time (what? is that weird?).
The hubby let me use his laptop for the 5 days it took me to get the laptop back with a new hard drive in it. And do you know what I did? I managed to get him a virus that LAID WASTE TO HIS LAPTOP. AVG can't get rid of it (it freezes up). There's some tech guys out there somewhere who can evidently get rid of it but doing it is time consuming at best and useless at worst. I found a page that tells you what to do - it involves lots of steps and I can't even understand the instructions. Dave took it to the computer shop and they said most likely they'll have to wipe out his hard drive.
Me. I did this. Gah.
The threats AVG listed all were imbedded in the Systems 32 folders and were called SKYNET. I tried to ferret them out with my limited capabilities but no go. So watch out. It'll eat your computer alive.
Anyway, Dave said he doesn't have anything on there he really wants to save. My youngest daughter had a story on there she wanted to save, but luckily I saw it on there while I was using it and sent it to myself via email a day or two ago, thinking she's want me to post it on her webpage for her. ("Weird Hamsters in Love" is the title - look for it in your bookstores one day.)
I'm Black Death. I feel really bad for Dave. Not to mention the years I'll get of, "Remember that time you wiped out my laptop?" So if you see me coming, hiding your tech? Not a bad idea.
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June 1st, 2009
| 04:49 pm - SPN favorite vidder
It's a tough call. There are several vidders in this fandom I'm pretty rabid about, but for me the vidder who consistently knocks it out of the ballpark is ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) proofpudding.
If you know me, you know I tend towards hard rock music, which makes her even more of an interesting choice for me to list as a favorite vidder -but even if I don't at first love her musical choices, they almost always grow on me to the point I'm totally converted when I see what the vid is communicating. She just sells it to me, each and every time.
To start off, the colors are gorgeous (I've actually made several backgrounds for my desktop from her vids, and oh I WISH I knew how she does it) - so clear and contrasty, often very warm-colored. I love that the sense of motion flows like something instinctive. The cuts always make sense to me. Quite a bit of her work focuses on character, exposing facets therein which I love. IF WE KEEP LIVING THIS FAST has a really amazing sensuality about it thanks to the clips chosen, how she uses them (close-ups, the speed played) and especially the soundbits included from the episodes themselves.
I really have too many favorites to name, but I'll try and pick a few:
helluva beat and the first one I hit on of hers - We Will Rock You
Born Under a Bad Sign (yeah. Sam.)
heartbreaker - Stay Awake
SamnDean - With You
this really doesn't cover all my favorites. It'll have to do, because honestly most of her vids become favorites.
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May 23rd, 2009
 | 12:30 am - buzzzzz
I have poison ivy. ON MY FACE. Around my nostrils. Heading towards soft tissue (shriek)!
They gave me 12 days of Prednisone and my brain is leaking out of my ears.
Earlier I posted a thing where you can ask to see anything on my desktop. Cass asked if I'm being an exhibitionist. The answer is YES.
I know I'm not around much, but if you have anything you feel like asking, if you have an urge or want to see something, ask. I'll PROBABLY do it.
If not, maybe I'm saved because I am roid raging and cannot TRUST MYSELF.
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May 16th, 2009
| 08:51 am - hubby says...
Dave doesn't watch SPN unless I'm watching it and he has nothing better to do. I was watching it last night with my little girl (she gets an edited version: "Oh, here comes a bad part. Close your eyes.") and Dave was in the room with us, reading. He sees Dean call Sam, and he looks up when Sam's retrieving the altered message. "Man, that's awful. Angels are cruel," he says and shakes his head.
That was one of the worst scenes of the series for me, so yeah. Worst in a good way - it was beautifully done.
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May 15th, 2009
April 26th, 2009
| 11:14 pm - Tawt I Saw a Rabbit
I saved a rabbit today:) I think. I'm pretty sure. I hope like hell.
This wild, pretty bunny lay at the side of the road in the grass and wiggled when I and Thumper went by on our walk. He/she couldn't move, but his eyes were bright (and scared). There was nothing I could do with the dog in tow, so I headed home. I got a box, lined it with a hand towel, put on gloves and went to get me a wabbit. Poor baby was still there, so I picked him up (or her, I don't know) and put him in the box, which he didn't care for much. There may have been a small bone poking through his leg, and there was a small amount of blood on both legs but they weren't crushed.
I was in the van with bunny in hand, rubbing his little shoulders because he didn't seem to stir so much when I rubbed (probably thought I was getting ready to take a mouthful of wabbit shoulder, poor baby). This wasn't a well-thought out plan - years ago I knew UT's vet school took in hurt wildlife, but it'd been years since I'd dropped in. Couldn't quite remember how to get there, so I get to a stop sign and call Cass, cradling the cell phone on my shoulder (yeah, imagine me bowed up double), one hand on wascally wabbit and the other on the steering wheel. Anyway, Cass googles, gives me the address and off we go. Such a cutie pie, with his big dark eyes and brownish fur. They took him in, said they had a rehabber who takes the bunnies in after they get better and releases them into the wild again in groups. I checked the box that asked them to let me know how he/she is, so here's hoping.
Send him/her your good karma:)
I found a picture online that looks a lot like him/her:
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April 24th, 2009
April 13th, 2009
March 20th, 2009
March 19th, 2009
March 18th, 2009
| 09:59 pm - I haz yur burd I tutch and kizzit
Some images deserve to be seen over and over again.
I swear it, I've read the fic that goes with this one. I HAVE. Really.
EDIT: I have FOUND the bird-containing story because I'm as anal as Sam is tall and had to go look for it: That Padalecki Kid by apostrophee based on The Mudge Boy -
“Put that damn bird outside,” dad says gruffly across the table.
See? Birds and Jared. Inevitable.
Edited to add for Dorian, though I figure you've already seen it - Dorkly Wonderful:
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March 14th, 2009
| 05:53 pm - discussion re: Sam and 4:15
You guys know I'm a Sam girl - but I'm more than that. I'm a SamandDean girl. Dean's amazing, and these two have a chemistry you can't find on shows anymore. The boys would never be the same without each other.
But I get tired of Sam being slammed! I think this is a nice, thoughtful discussion about Sam and why we like him here (spoilery, naturally).
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February 26th, 2009
| 12:50 am - I disputed the take-down of NOTHING ELSE MATTERS (S&H vid) on youtumor
Thanks to a currently flocked flister (waves to flister - shall I bring you a pie with a file;), I followed directions posted at youtubulous on how to sub a dispute based on fair use for "Nothing Else Matters." The video came up live immediately afterwards. I hope it stays - I do think the vid is kind of long and even ponderous, but it fits S&H like a glove iffin I say so myself.
I'll let you know what happens.
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February 19th, 2009
February 13th, 2009
| 11:15 pm - Torino nominations
I wanted to thank whoever(s) nominated my S&H gen site, myself as a vidder and my vid, "Nothing Else Matters" for the annual Torino Awards in the Starsky & Hutch fandom. I'm really surprised and touched by the nominations.
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February 10th, 2009
| 10:38 pm - news of the absurd (it made my heart pound)
Remember me talking about my thirteen year-old dog? We walk everyday. We've had a rottweiler come across a busy street after us. We've had a dog come clawing out from UNDER his fence to go after my old girl. One time it was a German shep. Once a bunch of dogs (five, I think) broke out of their backyard fence and swarmed us. We've even had two tiny dachsunds come out yapping and barking around us until Thump took each one, picked them up and tossed them gently away - with her long-ass nose, no less.
And this Monday my favorite: a pit bull. I almost pissed myself. She came running down the hill. I looked around for a branch or something but there was nothing. She crossed the road and jumped on Thumper. At first the dog didn't bite, but she was all over Thumper. Thumper growled and it set the dog off and that was it, they were fighting. It was scary seeing the pit bull go for Thumper's underbelly. Of course my dog was no match. Thumper pulled out of her collar at that point, and I whipped the pit bull in the head with the collar and leash several times. I think I kicked a little - it was hard because she was all over my dog.
And then imagine this, flist: the owner comes down the hill and YELLS AT ME FOR HITTING HER TWATTYASS DOG.
Turns out her TWO-YEAR old had let the dog out, and the dog never bites. Yeah. I hope to God her child has a face come next year.
She didn't like me, evidently - at the end of it all, she said she hoped I had fun jumping all over a twenty-one year old like that, to just go ahead, go on and take care of myself and my dog.
Thumper's okay, by the way. I checked her out. She just seemed pretty tired afterwards.
What the hell? Aren't there leash laws for twenty-one year olds?
When I buried her body in my backyard, I took another look. I could have sworn she was thirty at least.
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February 2nd, 2009
| 01:08 pm - kitten pictures (and a dog for good measure)
Remember the kitten I took in at the end of October? I heard him crying outside before dawn, and shortly thereafter he became one of the Borg (aka my family). Well, my dear Flea, aka Cottonball, aka Cottonius etc etc. is getting neutered at the vet's office today. He was pitiful this morning- didn't understand why I WOULD NOT feed his hungry self, he hated the carrier (we've taken him places before but never in the carrier - usually one of my daughters hold him), and he cried like a confused, hungry, miserable thing. My poor little Flea.
On the occasion of this, his first day in the world minus his balls, I have dragged out some photos I'd taken with our video camera not long after we first got him. He's a doll, you're gonna love him (I weep. He's not home yet.):
( see more kitty, kitty )
while I'm at it, have a picture of my beloved and lovely dog Thumper outside in the snow today. Thumper is also a former stray, just turning 13 this March
( click for doggy love, get your mind OUT of the gutter )
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January 31st, 2009
| 10:26 am - ramblings
I am SO SICK. I think I'm getting better, but it's been a week now (or longer). Damned asthma. Damned lungs. I have bronchitis and it doesn't want to let me sleep or function very well. I hate that this seems to be the worst bout ever. I've never had this much trouble just getting through the days. One reason I hate it is because it's like a signal to me - yeah, you're older, things are hitting harder. Shit. I hate it. I walk quite a bit with my dog, I try to do some healthy things, but still. Just fuck, I hate it.
The kitten, the one I never posted photos - the only digitial camera I had was on the video recorder, and the pictures were blurry. I still hope to post some up - my daughter took a few with her phone, and I got a digital camera for Xmas, one I've yet to use. Anyway, we've never settled on a name for him, though the names we most frequently call him are: Cottonball, Flea, Cottonius E. Ball, Wee Man. He's so damned cute and evil. He has no fear. In the middle of the night, sometimes he gets on the old Valentine's Day heart pillow and kneads and suckles, which makes me so sad. He had to leave his mom too soon.
Poor fellow's balls will be lopped off (wince) on Monday. I worry about him - they won't let me bring him home till Tuesday. Will he think we've left him forever?
The world of spn fandom: I've never been in a large fandom before - everything I was (am) interested in was fairly easy to keep up with, being I'm all, you know, OLDER, loving crazy or older or crazy and older shows. Okay, well, I couldn't keep up with the fiction in S&H, that's true. But the fiction in spn is just overwhelming. I have tons saved to read. I remember I came online once asking for dark fiction in the fandom, and the truth of the matter is, some of the absolute darkest fiction I've read in spn doesn't work for me. I have to be able to follow the character's reasoning or emotions as to why they'd sink that dark, or I have to be able to buy the situation they've gotten into for the duration, at least. Which is funny, because I relish tropes and crack. Not the crack labeled crack, ordinarily/necessarily, but the crack that is self-aware, I guess. I read astolat 's Bad Blood (Sam/Dean), and oh, oh my God, it's fuck or die with one hour to spare, and Dean's looking for ANYTHING to fuck. Yeah, anything, not just anyone. Pretty hysterical:) But there's plenty of dark, angsty fiction out there to make me happy, just not so extreme as I thought it had to be.
The thing about getting older: I've seen lots of women that just ACT so differently from me. I mean, of course we're all different, yes, but I feel like I'm from a different planet. Here I am, squirming around on my seat at the Brownie's meeting because they're talking about selling Girl Scout Cookies, and they're so EARNEST. I'm not all that social in a broad sort of way, folks, and I suspect I'm not always all that approachable. I grew up a strange mixture of somewhat coddled and very much neglected, good student, not so good environment, and I learned to just sort of wait and see what happened when I met someone. I'd check them out, see how they acted before I decided to communicate in a (somewhat) honest manner or to pretend until I could get away. Mostly, acquaintances just don't mean much to me, and I don't get joy out of meeting people. What I get is stress. Don't get me wrong - I wish people well, hope for them to be happy. It's just hard. Someone told me in junior high that they didn't talk to me because they thought I might be a bully. (I'm tall and pretty strong-looking, methinks, and I don't smile much at strangers. Though I laugh a whole lot when I'm with my girl friends. But.)
I just don't do well with that Brownie stuff. I'm not one for organizations, to tell the truth. When I was what, nine, ten? the people across the street took me to their church. The brother was the preacher. He shouted and jumped, told us we were going to hell. I thought it was sort of appalling. And he asked and pleaded and demanded that I get saved. I was pressured. I did it. The whole time I was thinking, just get through it. Never went back. I hear they prayed for me later. How humilating. For the longest time I had a phobia of churches. I still have an initial churning in the gut when I go inside one. (I'm possessed or something?) And hey, that preacher, it turned out, was stealing funds from the church. Great guy.
At least at soccer I can get all enthused about the girls and their team, but I don't know how to talk very well about booths and cookies and badges and shit. I'm SO BORED. (I might be a little happier with it if the girls made more than .50 a box for their troop activities, but probably not. Whatever.)
I just don't like gatherings of large people, ever (I went to a couple of cons, even, and was still uneasy, though I did meet some people I like:). Not because I hate people. Because I'm not comfortable.
All I want to do is take care of my family, help them to be happy, raise the girls right, to NOT DO housework (which, futile, but I hate it), write, watch shows I love, read, play on the laptop, play with my hobbies, get outdoors, and get together with my girl friends so I can laugh and curse and say crazy things (without people thinking I'm not ACCEPTABLE), drink sometimes and have fun. I've grown up in lots of ways, in terms of what I have to do, my responsibilities and consequences and accepting what I have to do if I want certain things, but as Cass says, the hoomans? Bewilder me.
But if you're reading this and you're twenty or thirty and you think you'll change a lot when you get into your forties, well -maybe you will. Maybe it'll be different for you. And maybe you won't - maybe you'll still feel close to the same inside, still have the same tendencies, feel the same things. Maybe you respond to them differently, yep. You might have more things figured out, sure.
I felt like I was 1,000 years old at times before I ever hit puberty, and at times I felt younger than my age. Hasn't changed. Just my physicality has, and regrettably, the lung rottage or whatthefuckever it is.
I've learned some things, though.
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January 13th, 2009
 | 09:22 pm - Supernatural Meme!
A Supernatural Meme!
My Favourite Season Is:
I don't have a favorite, though sometimes I think I enjoyed a greater number of S2 episodes... anyway, I like Season 1 and most of 2 for what I feel is fairly consistent characterization, pacing and a sense of purpose for the mytharc. Dislike for some episodes that are real stinkers (Wendigo, ugh, least favorite episode ever, and Bugs and Hook Man).
S3 falls short in the beginning with shallow, off-putting Dean characterization and ineffectual Samage (which continues throughout much of the season and is a disservice to the character, IMO) and a general lack of cohesion/vision/purpose for the show. Mix THAT up with diamonds like "Mystery Spot," "A Very SPN Xmas," and "Bad Day at Black Rock" and you've got a wildly fluctuating season. Still, I enjoyed most episodes even while critting them to death - the actors kept growing and the brotherly moments are always da bomb.
Add missteps like semi-regulars Bela (and a complete inability to sell her as either interesting or sympathetic) and Ruby ( I liked her more as the season went on though she was pretty one-note until the last episode of 3), both of them young 'n' pretty with neither the depth or presence of an Ellen or a Pamela, and you can call time of death on that little experiment almost before it started.
Having said all that? The last episode in S3 wrung me the hell out and hung me out to dry. It was some really good crack shit.
S4 amps it all up. Couldn't get a handle on Sam's head in the beginning episodes, which made me unhappy (being all Sam!crazy like I am). It was like whatever was going on with him was being hidden from the viewer, which, huh? The angels were interesting until that crazy literal stuff involving Anna in 4.10 losing her grace and hurtling to the ground, etc. Waaa? The more angels I see, the less I like - I think because no one is measuring up even halfway to Castiel. Still, the show found its balls or something. Yeah, or something - I gotta give them credit for throwing all the cards up in the air. Loved Sam's one-man show in "I Know What You Did Last Summer." Dying to see if they make a serious attempt at dealing with his demon blood and the consequences for him and Dean. Dying to know exactly why Castiel brought our Dean back from the land of fire and brimstone. And please, can I just say how happy I was to see him *happy* in Monster Movie, before they amped his angst back up again?
My Favourite Episode Is/episodes are:
I named a few I love above. Add No Rest for the Wicked, Born Under a Bad Sign, Croatoan, Metamorphosis (yes I know some of you are going huh? Croatoan, Metamorph? but yeah), Hunted, Tall Tales, All Hell Breaks Loose, OH SHIT, there's many many more I truly love even if they aren't my very favorites and who can tell from this list anyway blabbity blab...
I Cry everytime:
Nope, I don't.
The Religious Angle In Season 4:
Wait and see sez me, but kinda not having faith in it. I hope very much that it works out.
The "Special Children" Storyline:
Once they put it in there, they should have done justice to it and gave us a logical, satisfying conclusion as to their purpose and why they had to die. They just wiped them out with an explanation thin as tissue and spit and it pisses me off. It's a cheat.
Ruby:
I liked Katie Cassidy all right and I liked her quite a bit in the S3 finale, but I never thought she was irreplacable. Until our new Ruby, which ouch, now I miss Katie MOAR. BUT...new Ruby, she's a crap actor and somehow I still kind of like Genevieve (even though she honestly makes me wince at times). I know, I know, shoot me. There's never been a nice straight ruler for my tastes. I like the bad, I like the good and even the embarrassing - who knows why?
Bela:
Bela who? She just never made much of an impression.
Lillith:
I liked that mean little girl with the gap-tooth smile. What a bitchy kid! Now where the hell did SHE GO? Show? Anybody?
The Episode(s) that Really Creeped Me Out:
I have a major eyeball phobia, as in near psychotic, so Nightmare most definitely, but only because of that. Loved the scarecrow in Scarecrow, he looked great and the orchard was spooky-ooky. Loved Simon Said for that GREAT scene with the blonde lady in the trenchcoat dousing herself with gasoline and setting herself on fire (er it was Simon Said, right?).
My Theory On How The Show Will End:
Sam's not evil. Dean's gained self-worth. They drive off into the sunset in the Impala. Sam will always be a freak to Dean (who loves him).
Okay, I like the part about driving off into the sunset in the Impala, but hope like hell they go down Angsty Road and make Sam EVIL first, make us throw up our own hearts and EAT THEM in the process of straightening it all out, show Dean he's truly the good guy and give him some healing. But how to make Sam evil and not damage him irreparably? As in how could he live with himself? No cheats allowed, but I'm sure it could be done. Couldn't it?
Hell, the show's already messed both these guys up irreparably. I don't see how they get up every day. So.
Part of me (small small part - the same part that wrote that short, unhappy story about it) wants Sam to go so evil bad that there's no going back. But then the problem is THAT I WOULD DIE OF WOEFUL-ILITY, SADNESS AND MORBIDITY. Because at heart I'm a WIMP and can't take the sad (unless I'm dishing it out, ha).
BUT BUT BUT! Better that they end it badly than that Sam and Dean settle into suburbia with house, white picket fences and 2.5 children. Because I know the show's about horror, folks, but please no. Those guys would be total strangers to me.
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